a few of my favorite things...

First of all, my very very very favorite thing - This bed.
I really love sleeping. I really love going to bed and I love waking up in this bed. (Not to be confused with being woke up.) On days when I can just lay there and watch the sun get brighter and cuddle with my boys, awhhhhhh, angels in the choir.  It's the mixture of the messy blankets, ample amount of pillows, the blues, creams, and whites. Just perfection. I am excited to get our new house and bring this fav into it and have beautiful wood floors and paint the walls a beautiful beige. Currently, the walls are purple and it makes me want to vom.









 Next is this thing. It's a card that I push on my eyelid while I apply mascara. Keeps the black off my face and allows me to layer and gunk up the mascara as much as I want forcefully. Love it.

Finally, I am so happy it is "summertime" and I can wear light scarves and pretty shirts.  Summertime is one of my favorite things. It makes the days go by faster and the evenings longer. And if you look in the background of this picture you can see my calendar. Grant got me this for Valentines one day and just this morning I switched it from May to June!!! Something I can't believe is already here!

Isn't she lovely?



I hope someday I have a beautiful little
girl to put baby legs and tutus on.



NYC

like hi blog

Me and Kelsey at the Last Tree Standing
at the Twin Towers Memorial

Okay, I'm a little annoyed with my boring blog. I'm working on figuring out how to personalize it and not use a pre-made setup. Ya know? And I also want to have meaningful posts. Something to write about before I start writing. Luckily, I went to New York this past weekend and finally have something worthwhile to type.

I went to NYC to visit one of my besties Kelsey. Kelsey is a firery red-head and I am always a little nervous what we're gonna get ourselves into whenever I see her.  She's the type of girl who could kick your ace and then will pray for forgiveness from Jesus. In high school she banged my head repeatedly into my locker. I don't remember what for, but it showed everyone that you don't mess with Kelsey Moore, not even if you're her "friend". :)  At least she's an honest friend, I mean hey, if she's willing to bang her own friends' head into a locker, she's probably got your back in any situation. She is my hired bouncer for the wedding. Glad that's covered.

WTC Memorial

I flew to NY Friday morning. G dropped me off and I rushed through security, because there was no way I was missing this get out of MN flight. I switched planes in Chicago and I sat in a 3 seater row. It was like this -

 

Window - Weirdo - Open Seat - Me - Aisle.

 

 Okay, the weirdo was a strange dude. Probably 40 years old and didn't say one word. Fine. I don't like talking to new people anyway. But the weird thing was, he caught me looking out the window and then quickly slammed it shut. Ummm.. okay, fine. I won't look out "his" window. It get's weirder.. he peeks out the window, looks back over at me to see if I'm trying to see out it, and then shuts it quick again! How bizarre! He does this probably 5 times. I'm convinced he's nuts. I realllllllly wanted to look out the window and see Manhattan from the sky. This guy was not digging it. 

Pedicures in China Town

It was sprinkling rain the whole time I was in NYC. Which didn't totally blow because we spent much needed time getting pedicures and our makeup done and eating.  We went to a couple clubs at night but honestly, everyone was too old to be there, and a little creepy. I felt very small and white and scared. I was glad to have Kelsey with me.  So we went back to her place and were not tired enough to go to sleep, that's when we decided it was a good idea to get my belly button pierced. YOLO right?





So I went to the tattoo shop and a girl with some nice skull tattoos shoved a needle through my gut. Yowch! I've had quite a few piercings before, but holy moly this one took the cake. I think I was just so not nervous that no endorphins rushed to my poor belly to take care of the pain. I was turning gray and about to pass out when a little midget came and gave me some water. (When I saw the midget I really thought I had lost it.) Kelsey confirmed it was a real midget and I hadn't lost all thought.

The next day I went to church with Kelsey with my fresh belly ring.  Her church is the exact opposite of my Missouri Synod church. Such an experience! Held in a theatre, with a live band, and a black preacher. It was incredibly entertaining. You get so caught up in the moment there it's pretty cool. I'm glad she has found some peeps her age that love God and get together and pretty much have a party for Jesus every week. Awesome.



We rushed out of "church" to catch my flight. Kelsey dropped me off at the airport. Not 5 minutes later I had to call her back to get me because my flight was leaving from New Jersey. F! We made it to New Jersey in like 4 hours (which is supposed to be a 45min drive). I don't know what part of NJ we ended up in, but blatantly, it was a shit hole. Just disgusting. Garbage everywhere. Places that don't take credit cards (white girl problems) and not very friendly people. Really made me want to get back to MN A.S.A.P


When I finally got to MN my boo picked me up in my car. He had vacuumed and washed my car to the 9's. What a honey! He took me home and he had cleaned the apartment as well. Such a good G. When he asked me what I got him in NYC, I reminded him that he once told me that next time I want to get him a gift, to get something for myself instead, so I showed him my belly button ring and he couldn't be happier. Lol

this old house

The House -We got our appraisal back on the house! And it was over what we are paying for it! So that means we are going to get the house for sure!!! Thank God, because I have a lot of plans for that home and don't know if I could handle yet another loss. (Previously, I had fallen in love with a couple other homes and had my heart broken.)

Isn't it just heavenly? I have always wanted a big yellow house.  But it had to be older than my great grandparents and it had to be in good shape and not in St. Paul. Not an easy find. Luckily for us, some people got divorced and foreclosed on their house.
And man, it is perfect perfect PERFECT!!!!  It has 4+ bedrooms, I plan on making a lot of babies.. or having some serious closets.  The kitchen is bigger than our current apartment, there are stairs in the pantry! There are 2 bathtubs and no standing showers, I really don't like those standing showers. There is a fantastic attic with a secret door that I just can't wait to turn into Narnia (a story I never read). 3 living areas. AND a freaking creepy basement. What more do I need? Really, what else could I ask for? Oh! It also has the biggest yard on the block. I can't wait to put up a pretty white fence. Fences make the best neighbors ya know?  I want to move NOW! Gotta get married and stuff first though. OK fine.


No luck in the nanny job search, I was pretty discouraged and need to just hold off a couple weeks/months and wait until people are looking for a school year nanny for their little babes. Instead of a summer nanny for their pre-teen brats.


I'm changing my fashion fails of the day section to..

Just Clothes - Because I'm from the Midwest, I don't know anything about "fashion" but I know some stuff about clothes. I'd say there's a difference.

So here's my outfit from yesterday. I've been really digging stripes lately.  Horizontal ones make ya look wider, so I paired it with a skinny belt to show that I'm not really that wide.  But the stripes sure do show off my hippys. I'm okay with that. I put a sweater on and completed the look. THANKFULLY it got up to 98 degrees yesterday and I was able to take off the sweater and work on my tan. I rarely complain about weather ever. I love snow and think it's pretty, but it is so nice to be warm.

"Don't touch my butt"

Why do I even have to say this?  Shouldn't it be a duh?
Often when I'm just standing, one of my kiddos will just touch my butt. I don't know if its at the right height that its irresistible,  or if its just a phase. But I don't know how to handle this situation.
I had to say to him, "Don't touch my butt, would you like it if I touched your penis?!" Thank God he said "no."
Please just be a phase.

'merica and its mommies

Fashion Fail of the Day-

 

Oh hey there! It's me. I wanted to wear this blue and white tank top because I want it to be summer. Unfortunately, it's 35 degrees out. So I have to wear a sweater. My options for sweaters are neutrals, lime green, or red.  I picked the red because it's clean. I feel like a real American in this outfit.  I'm planning on going to caribou today, because it's pay day, and that will make up for the 5$ drink. Right? Also I spent a good hour last night mending all of the chewed up undies I had piled up from George. I deserve the coffee. Right? Anyway, I hope that when I'm in Caribou people don't assume I'm wearing the American flag because I'm a proud citizen today.  Hopefully now that gay marriage passed MN can focus on a real issue.

 

Nanny Diaries-

I'm trying to find a new nanny family because I'm moving.  It is REALLY hard.  Usually I have tons of interviews and get to be picky. But now I've heightened my standards in my families because I have been spoiled by my current families. I'm thinking 1 baby maximum and no on the side night babysitting and a fantastic paycheck.  But... people do not want to pay for child care. Some lady offered me 50 dollars/day because she knew I would just love her son and it would be worth it. Ummm.. WHAT?! Another person was at 8 dollars/hr. And I was like, do you know minimum wage is going up to 10 dollars an hour? I could work at McDonalds (my most favorite place) and NOT have to deal with your snotty child and get free burgers. I am  not a babysitter.  I am an educator. I am a daytime nanny. I am not putting your kid to bed and watching t.v. and raiding your fridge. I am, quite frankly, replacing YOU, mommy. I have a degree in this. I know what I'm doing. Good grief. Frustrated. I have even broadened my search to look at jobs at the YMCA with the kiddy area and even applied at a home daycare as a helper. She said she'd like to get back to me this fall.  Sure lady, I'll just wait 4 months and see what you think about me then. UGHHHHH. Everyone wants babies. Nobody wants to pay for them. Just because they have to do it for free they don't understand that this is my whole income. I have to get paid. Kind of like a prostitute. I do what you do for free, but get paid for it. And people don't like that.  Except my current nanny families who genuinely appreciate my help.  These pregnant women with no kids are the worst. They don't quite "get it" yet. They are excited to be a "mom" and leave their baby with a nanny all day and only have to put it to bed and then want me to babysit on the weekends so they can have a "break". DO YOU EVEN WANT TO BE A PARENT? Gah.

 

Alright. Done ranting. Gotta go hang out with my besties! It's going to be a great day! It's Friday!

hello sunshine!

Yay! It's summer time! Finally! Oh how I've missed the beach. I no longer have to watch movies and eat popcorn and be lazy with the kids. (Not that it was so terrible, just will be nice to be tanning instead.)

I LOVE summer with the kids. We go to the beach, the water park, the pond, the park, biking, wagon rides, stroller rides, trolley rides, OH MY GOSH I'M SO EXCITED FOR SUMMER.  The best part is we can take any learning activity or game and move it outside. Less mess inside = more fun.

Andddd I get to marry Grant next month! Wow, it's finally almost here!

Fashion Fail of the Day

 

Not too bad. I like my outfit today. Scarf, flowy open back shirt, pink shorts, white sandals, summer! It makes me want to lose 5lbs but not enough to add that to my to-do list. However, my face could be considered a fail. I put makeup on and my hair is decent. But I look tired. That's why it's not here.

Friday-Wednesday we were babysitting our nephew, Cosmo. And now that he's been gone for oh, 30 minutes, George is back to annoying me. He is sitting between my legs under the desk. Poor little buddy is lonely. I suppose I can take him out for a summer walk. Toodeloo!

things I love about my G

Since I'm in wedding and honeymoon mode I thought it would be somewhat appropriate to talk about my G a.k.a Grant.  I'm not typically mushy mushy lovey dovey.  PDA makes me throw up a little.  But he's my soon-to-be hubby and I get to say whatever I want about him. So there.
I love my G. I mean I LOVEEEE my G. (As I type this he is sluuuuuurping some frozen yogurt shake and I am ready to dump it over his freakin' head because I can't stand the sound. That said. I still love him. Deep breath, Audry.) Let me count the ways..
1. He is frugal to everything and everyone (except me).  He can save money like it's nobody's business.  I've never seen it done so well. Just never ever buying anything ever, unless it is high quality and going to be a good decision at least for the next 5 years to come.  This is a quality I need in my man, because frankly, I suck at money.  Really suck. I buy things on a whim because it makes me happy.  That's the only reasoning.  I'm one of those people who tries to promise myself that I'll save tomorrow and not get a morning coffee.  As if that will make up for buying 5 new outfits at Heartbreaker.  Anyway, he saves money. And once we're married we have 1 joint bank account and I will have no choice but to frugal up and suck it up.
2.He is very tall and has blue eyes. 'Nuf said.
3. He is kind. He can step in someone else's shoes. He is never rude. He can be honest without being offensive.  He is good at meeting people and talking to strangers. He is quick to say he's sorry and even quicker to forgive.  He won't hold a grudge.  He doesn't complain or trash talk.  He puts everyone else first. I am so selfish in comparison. I will always put myself first and make sure my needs are being met, in my relationship, my work, and day to day life. He would never do that. I have to remind myself to make sure I'm trying  my best to meet his needs because he would never say them out loud.  Even how I just said that like, "oh poor me, I have to make sure he's okay." There I go, being selfish. I will work on it, try to be more like him.
4. He can do math very quickly in his head.  Okay, fine, not a reason to love someone. But I do love that about him. I can be adding things up and just use him as a calculator. Quite handy.
5. His clothes. 50% of the time, he is dressed like a slob. When he is home, he wears the most ragged shiz (the frugality is definitely accountable). But, when we need to dress up, go anywhere, when he's at work - he can put himself together so well.  He cares about textures and patterns.  At first I thought this was a little "gay". It's not gay. It's hot that his clothes match.  He has a creative side to him that just "gets it". His shoes. His hair. His sunglasses. He just knows what is in style and how to do it. Yay, G!

6. But most of all, I love G because he makes me feel good. I am always so excited to come home and be with him. He cooks for me. He is hilarious. He rubs my feet. He surprises me with Mt. Dew and Big Macs. He compliments me. He supports me. We have the same dreams.
Grant is a serious Gemini, I never know what I'm gonna get. Everyday is a gamble. We have good days and bad days. We fight A LOT. But our good times are so so so influential that the bad days are disregarded.

53 Days to go!

Counting down the days until I marry my Grant! My biggest fear is that the night will go by too fast. How can I slow time on the day of our wedding? I have so many exciting things happening in my life right now I just want to hit the slow motion button and enjoy it.  (Minus the lingering swelling from the wisdom teeth removal, that can go ahead and make like a tree.) I am so ready for the wedding, everything is prepared except the food :) If it was this weekend we would be good to go! It's super annoying my checklist has come to a halt. I can't go get my nails done yet, and that's the last thing I need to do before the big day, so here I am twiddling my un-manicured thumbs.  Everyone is warning me that we are going to run out of time and be stressed the week leading up to the big day. Not sure what they mean by that.. I did everything 5 months ago.

Fashion Fail of the Day - okay, okay, I wore a sweater that is too short for me.  It is one of those high skinny ones that don't look good on anyone really. And to top it off I threw it over a high waisted dress, I just looked motherly mostly. What I should have done... wore a baggier longer sweater and a tight belt over the whole thing to show off my waistline.  I also wore a claw hair clip which no one should wear ever. But I forgot my pony tail and it was my nanny moms and I ran out of hydrocodone OKAY?! Geesh. Give me a break. I should have taken the hint when Baby A's poop soaked through her clothes and onto my sweater that it was ugly. Thanks Baby A for reminding me.

Sometimes I want to put her in my
Nine West and bring her home.
Then I remind myself I LOVE sleeping.
But just LOOK at the fat rolls on her wrists.
I could eat her up!

Couple cute kids quotes--

Teaching F about the American Flag today. I told him, "We live in The United States of America! And Excelsior!"
F's Response, "And my house!"
Yes, yes, very good young one.

Yesterday, while playing "I Spy"
E takes her turn and says, "I spy something brown and leafy."
Big B shouts, "A leaf!"
E, "Correct!"
At this point I'm so bored Lawrence Welk sounds entertaining.








The Dog - He has this terrible terrible TERRIBLE new thing to paw at me. ALL THE TIME. I know it's a sign he's not getting the attention he wants. I say attention "he wants" because good grief he gets enough attention.  No, he doesn't need more exercise. No, he's not hungry. He needs to stop pawing. Ignoring him is too painful, literally. Yelling at him makes him more excited. I locked him in the bathroom for a good 2 minutes and he wouldn't stop doinging the door doinger I had to let him out. WHY MUST HE PAW? It hurts. I'm borderline bleeding. Damn dog. I can't wait to have a yard and a fence and dog house outside. He will be an outside dog all summer. (Who am I kidding?) Maybe if we're lucky he will run away. I won't give up on him on purpose, but if he just disappeared I wouldn't be too heartbroken. Bad mommy.

I love Hydrocodone

Okay, normally I am super against any and all pills.  I can take a nap or have a banana and bounce out of anything. But I gotta tell ya, since I had my teeth pulled I can't get enough of these suckers in my belly. I even woke up this morning feeling withdrawal since I didn't have any ALL night.  I'm hoping my words here are clear, I'm pretty "pilled up".

Here is my wisdom teeth removal story.
I was TERRIFIED. I have never ever been so scared in my life before.  I have never had to go to the doctor for anything other than swine flu.  To think they were going to put me to sleep and take out part of my body just freaked my out. When we got to the clinic, it was literally 2 minutes and I was in the chair getting my arms tied down and having a needle stuck in it.  I asked the girl doing the anesthesia if she could stop poking my arm and wait until I was asleep. She snarly responded that, "No, this is how I put you to sleep." Rawr. Like how the hell was I supposed to know that? Then I asked how long it would take, would I fall asleep right away? (Meanwhile thinking.. why is nobody talking to me and telling me what's going on? Hello? I've never had my teeth pulled before or been put to sleep and put my vulnerable body in the hands of strangers. Garsh!) She said that "It would be a while" before I fall asleep. Nope. She lied. That's my last recollection.

What I was told happened after the procedure...

The surgery took 15 minutes.  When I came out of it I was crying and smiling, so happy I lived through it.  Then I started whispering to my mom about how cute my male nurse was and how I hoped he didn't notice the zii zii on my nose. (He was cute. I do remember that.)  He of course could hear me because I am not a sneaky whisperer when drugged out. So my mom kept poking me and telling me to "hush".  My mom had me put my engagement ring back on because I was freaking out that I had lost it, she had it on the whole time, no worries.  Anyway, she pretty much blew any chances I had with the nurse. Whatever. I asked the nurse if I could keep my teeth. He said he had already thrown them away. Whoa! Now I'm pissed. Can't just throw away my body parts! I ask him if he was a wrestler. He said yes, he used to wrestle in Iowa for High School. And my response is to tell him how terrible of a wrestler he probably is and how JCC probably beat him because we were FOUR times state champions. Don't ya know?  I also manage to say goodbye to the doorman, and call him by his correct name.
By the time we got home I had snapped out of it and watched T.V. shows about people buying their first house. I didn't fall asleep. I have never watched so much T.V. in my life. It felt pretty good.  Yesterday, I felt fantastic the whole day and was able to eat BBQ's and potato chips for dinner. Today, my face is swollen and I can barely open my mouth. Sucky.
That's it for teeth talk. I don't have anything else to say about that.

I can't figure out how to turn the picture. But as you can see here,
the zii zii under my nose was obviously large enough for the hot nurse to see. Dangit.

    

I'm new here

Hello!
I'm new at this.

I've always wanted to blog. I've tried it a few times but I only remember to write while I'm drinking alone. It doesn't usually work out.
I am going to try to do this sober. Bear with me.

I want to write about my stories as a nanny, my wedding plans, fashion, my new house and my dog mostly.

Nanny Notes - I am a nanny of 5 sweet, sweet kiddos.  But, am very eager to move on with my life and find a new nanny family and start a daycare.  - Anticipating Fall '14 -   I can assume this blog will be filled mostly with stories about these buggers because I spend most of my time with them.. and rarely talk to adults.  Today, while F was pottying, I said, "You are SO potty trained!" and his response was, "You can't believe it!"  He is a sweetie.   He potty trained himself by the age of 2. COMPLETELY POTTY TRAINED HIMSELF. I like to think I had something to do with it. But really, this kid's perfect.

The Wedding - I am getting married! No, he's not the "man of my dreams" but he will do.  We aren't soul mates. We usually have a hard time getting along. But boy oh boy are we crazy about each other. He loves me mad.  He is a 6 and I am a 9. My "therapist" says even if we are miserable in our relationship, we will never ever break up, because that's just the "type" of people we are. I can't decide if this is reassuring.

Fashion - I don't know much about fashion. But I know a lot of people don't have a freakin' clue.  How hard can it be to look in a mirror and tell if you look like a moron or not? I am guilty of being lazy M-F with my clothes (I'm a nanny, and the kids don't care). But if I'm going in public I try to look like it's 2013 for Pete's sakes! So here I will post things I see people doing wrong, and admitting what I'm doing wrong today with my outfit.
So today, I am not wearing matching socks. This isn't a huge no-no, but come on Audry, get your shit together!  Do you think F's mom is okay with her nanny not even matching her own socks? If her nanny doesn't care to match her socks, does she even care about the kids? We don't know!
Also my hair is too greasy, and I have a huge zii zii on my nose that I didn't bother to cover.  Hope I didn't scare the children. These are easy fix no no's.  A shower and some coverup would have fixed this. I wouldn't feel comfortable in Target looking like I do. Shame.

New House!! - We are in the final stages of buying a house! Just have to get the inspector out there to make sure everything is decent. I say "decent" because we are well aware there are TONS of things we could update with the house. But we are eager and able to fix 'er up. What have we got better to do with our life?  It's yellow and not in the city or suburbs - and that's what is most important.

The Dog - George - He is a terror. The most recent thing he ruined - A pen and it's cap. He loves pens. If he can get his teeth wrapped around a pen he will take it apart piece by piece (literally) and crack it until the ink explodes on the carpet.  I love him more than I love most of my friends though.

George watching Future Hubby cook.  He always does this.